QUANDARY AND ME

'Peace' is the word the depth of which I endeavour,aspire and admire to explore.'Satisfaction' almost synonymous to the above is one I hardly gift myself.'Happiness is yet another I never agree I have had.If it appears I m in my blues ,I wonder, what was the last time I was not in my blues?
Today my heart is encumbered with regret,guilt and an undiscovered emotion which questions-the exhorbitant cost of which unintentional gaffee am I forced to indemnify?,but the fact that it has the answers is the impetus behind my silence.Unfolding the circumstances that provoked me to dive into so a deep thought ,i sincerely admit and declare thet none other than me is responsible or to be blamed.
A week ago I ventured taking up a responsibility with utmost positive hope of generating reasonably decent ensue.I projected great valour and made my way through in a docile manner.It completely wrenched me physically and most of all mentally and emotionally.Inspite all I moved on with an imbecile expectation.I did put aside most of my critical preoccupations to add up to efforts which intend to make this vested responsibility fairly acceptable though not grand success.From placing things into place,to connecting them,to making the network work I left no stone unturned.It wouldnt evev be close to the vicinity of exaggeration if I say I went beyond myself just to get things into shape.
On the 'the day' my composure companied me until some intractable people(rogues) intended to nullify my efforts by showing up their cheap attitude which provoked not only my composure to desert me but also me to desert the venue without giving a second thought.I was no exception to the fact that we tend to exacerbate the predicament we are in bt hurting the ones dear to us unintentionally.Fortunately the one I hurt was too benevolent to understand my self created predicament,ignore my ruthlessness and later forgive me for the same.
The event took a good shape after I left as those responsible for my leaving were forced to leave by the management,but was too late for me to return and join my friends to taste the pie I cooked.
The regret and guilt is just that I didnt give a second thought and reacted too in a haste......missed yet another memory.